35 Years of Marriage: Lessons in Faith, Fasting, and Laughter

Marriage is a journey filled with love, challenges, growth, and – if you’re lucky – plenty of laughter. As my husband, Mike, and I celebrate 35 years together, I can honestly say that our marriage is stronger now than ever before. Looking back, I see how faith, fasting, and a willingness to surrender to Christ have shaped us as a couple. It hasn’t always been easy, but the Lord has been present every step of the way, leading us toward a deeper, more joyful bond.

Inviting Christ Into Marriage

One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned is that marriage is not just about two people – it’s about three. When we invite Christ into our marriage, we allow Him to bear the weight of our struggles, our emotions, and our burdens. There was a time when I thought I had to handle everything myself. I would get caught up in frustration, anger, and shame when things didn’t go as planned. But through spiritual fasting, I’ve come to understand that true peace comes from surrendering it all to Christ.

Revelation 3:20 reminds us:

“Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.”

The Lord is always knocking. He desires to be present in our marriages, to carry the heaviest burdens, and to transform our hearts. We just have to open the door.

The Power of Fasting in Marriage

A few years ago, I discovered the practice of spiritual fasting, and it has completely changed my life and my marriage. Fasting has given me clarity, emotional balance, and a stronger connection to both God and my husband. It has helped me break free from the need for control and lean into the grace of patience and humility.

For this Lent, Mike and I decided to take on a new challenge: giving up sugar, flour, and alcohol for the entire season. It hasn’t been easy, but it has drawn us closer together in ways I never expected. We’ve replaced Saturday night drinks with game nights alongside other Catholic couples. We’ve deepened our prayer life, supported each other through moments of weakness, and witnessed the power of fasting in bringing about transformation.

Learning to Laugh Together

If there’s one thing that keeps a marriage strong, it’s laughter. There was a time when I took everything so seriously, when my perfectionist tendencies got the best of me. I was more concerned about how things looked than how they felt. But over time, I’ve learned to let go and embrace the humor in life’s unexpected moments.

Take, for example, a recent trip to the airport. As we were heading to our gate, my overloaded carry-on bag toppled over, and before I knew it, I fell flat on my face. The humiliation was immediate, but so was the laughter. Instead of getting angry or embarrassed (as I might have done years ago), I found myself laughing alongside my husband, grateful for the moment and for the man who has been by my side through it all.

That ability to laugh together is a gift – a sign of a marriage rooted in joy, humility, and a shared understanding that life is too short to take too seriously.

Shifting Burdens to Christ

For so long, I carried my struggles alone, expecting Mike to bear the weight of my emotions and frustrations. But marriage isn’t about putting all our burdens on each other – it’s about surrendering them to Christ. Once I learned to shift my pain, fears, and anxieties onto Him, our marriage changed. I no longer expected Mike to be my emotional anchor; instead, we leaned on Christ together, allowing Him to guide us.

If you’re struggling in your marriage, I encourage you to invite Jesus under your cross. He’s there, waiting to help you carry it. Through prayer, fasting, and a willingness to surrender, He will transform your marriage in ways you never imagined.

Looking Ahead

Thirty-five years in, and I can honestly say I love my husband more today than ever before. Not because we have a perfect marriage, but because we’ve learned how to navigate the imperfections with faith, patience, and a whole lot of laughter. I pray that we continue to grow, to laugh, and to love as Christ intended.

If you’re looking to strengthen your marriage, start small. Pray together. Fast together. Laugh together. And most importantly, trust that God is always working behind the scenes, shaping you both into the people He created you to be.

Here’s to another 35 years – God willing!

Help Beth reach her goal of bringing 1 Million Catholics back to the Church 

Please subscribe to the podcast and leave a review! 

Delay and Pray® Links:

Get your copy of Delay and Pray® (book)

The Catholic Fasting Coach

Instagram

Facebook

LinkedIn